Comparison is the Thief of Joy…or is it?
Comparison is the thief of joy...Ever find yourself caught in the comparison trap? I get it – it’s easy to scroll through others’ social media feeds or websites and wonder, “Am I doing enough?” Let’s dive into why constantly measuring ourselves against others can zap the joy out of our creative journeys. Let’s also explore some ways comparison can actually be used to our benefit!
Who said, “Comparison is the thief of joy?”
No one can pinpoint EXACTLY where the quote “Comparison is the thief of joy” comes from, but it is usually attributed to President Theodore Roosevelt, the 26th President of the United States. It’s one of my favorite quotes of all time!
This quote is often used by Christians as well because the apostle Paul writes to the church in Galatia that Christians should avoid “the comparison game” :
“Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else”
Regardless of the origins or “who said it first,” the wisdom behind the quote remains a valuable reminder to focus on personal growth and happiness without being burdened by constant comparisons.
How comparison can steal our joy
It can create low self-esteem and negative feelings
This constant measuring up against others’ lives is a quick way to trap yourself into a cycle of low self-esteem and discontent. The constant comparison to another person’s journey can make you feel like your life, or your work just doesn’t measure up.
But it’s crucial to remind ourselves that every minute spent comparing is a moment stolen from creating happiness in our own life!
It can create unrealistic expectations
We all know that social media is a highlight reel. Social media platforms are meant to showcase peak moments, filtering out the mundane, the struggles, and the uneventful daily life (which is 99% of MY life…you to?!)
This distortion can lead to unrealistic expectations. The danger is forgetting the selective nature of these posts, which then fuels a cycle of never feeling ‘enough’. Comparison on these platforms doesn’t just steal joy; it can leave a sense of being not being “enough.”
You can also be sucked into comparing your business or your work-life with others. I have been down this road MANY times. When I first started blogging, I would look at other photography and the work of other bloggers and constantly wonder why I couldn’t produce that quality of work.
You have to realize that everyone is in a different place. You can’t expect yourself to be at the same level as someone who has YEARS more experience than you! Unfortunately, it took me SO LONG to understand this simple concept! I felt like I wanted it all NOW!
It can make us envious and unhappy with what we have
I’m dating myself, but I remember watching Beverly Hills 90210 back in the day and ALWAYS thinking to myself, “Man I wish I had Kelly’s hair,” or “I wish my high school was like that!”
Although that’s a childish example, thoughts like this happen with grown adults every.single.day. “I wish I was that skinny,” “I wish I my house looked like that!”
While those thoughts are totally normal, too many of these negative thoughts can lead to becoming envious, and downright unhappy with what we have!
The benefits of comparison
Comparing yourself to others often feels like a battle you can’t win. However, being able to see situations where looking at someone else’s achievements MOTIVATES you is huge!
You can choose to see comparison not as a thief of joy but instead, something that can guide you toward your own personal growth and self-improvement. It’s a matter of flipping the script in your head and asking, “How can their success inspire me to elevate my game?”
Since I am a sports mom, I constantly hear that my kids NEED to be pushed to play and compete with kids better than they are. Being a big fish in a small pond might make you feel good, but it doesn’t challenge or inspire you.
How to turn comparison into something helpful
There are four main ways to flip the comparison game from being the thief of joy to something that can truly help you:
- Focus on your own goals and growth: Obsessing over where you stand compared to others is tempting, but the best thing you can do to combat this is to reflect on your personal achievements and continue to work hard to achieve your own goals.
- Practice gratitude: One of the best ways to rid yourself of those icky feelings of discontent is to be GRATEFUL. Getting in the habit of regularly acknowledging the good (no matter how small) in your life can bring you great joy.
- Celebrate your unique qualities: Each of us brings something different to the table, and cherishing these distinct traits helps you appreciate your own value rather than obsessing over someone else’s.
- Transform envy into inspiration: I think this is especially hard for women, but BE HAPPY FOR OTHERS!! BE INSPIRED BY OTHERS!! When feelings of envy emerge, one of the best things you can do is to let that MOTIVATE you! See others’ successes as examples of what’s possible and help them fuel your ambition.
I hope this gives you a little sense of how comparison is the thief of joy (especially social comparison)! However, given the right mindset, you can easily turn this comparison from the thief of joy to helpful inspiration!
